Jobless Engineer Sets Up Slum Near College To Get Free Home Under 'Rajiv Awas Yojana'!

Slum created by Akash (Pic Courtesy: Nitin Photowala: 90324456668)

Mumbai : Amidst all the recent surge of rising unemployment in India, the youth of India has now found various ways to cope with this problem.

It seems Akash Engineerwala, a guy from Bandra has found a unique way to cope up with this so called issue of 'unemployment'. Yesterday Akash set up an illegal slum near his college with the help of his friends Ajay and Navin to get the benefits of 'Rajiv Awas Yojana' whose one of the primary objectives is to improve and provide housing, basic civic infrastructure and social amenities in intervened slums.

"I am very happy today. Finally I'll have a house of my own, under the 'Rajiv Awas Yojana'. I was already tired of taunts like "Nalayak, kya fayada hua engineering karke, na toh tujhe job hai, na hi tera khud ka ghar, zindagi vyarth hai teri' and how my engineering degree is a waste, from my close relatives. So I decided I should do something about this. And here I'm. All prepared to take possession of my 'to be ready' house!*exclaims with joy*" said Akash to our news correspondent.

On being asked how did he come to know about 'Rajiv Awas Yojana', Akash replied, 

"Yesterday I was watching TV, admiring Sunny Leone in some advertisement*blushes*. Just as my eyes were glued to the television, the advert got over abruptly and then I saw this 'Rajiv Awas Yojana' thing. That moment was the best moment of my life. That moment was even better than the day when my college crush had smiled at me! *Navin interrupts* " She had smiled at the guy behind you, who is now her boyfriend"...*after a  momentary silence and some exchange of negative vibes among them,Akash starts speaking again* "Yeah, whatever. That moment I switched of the TV and went to the nearby shop to eat Mentos, which hellped me in thinking about this idea to bulid a slum near my college!!"

College authorities are unfazed about this and are making continous efforts to remove his slum from their campus. Our correspondent contacted the Principal of the college on this issue.

"This is totally an absurd thing to set up a slum in college campus. I know students love our college, but then this is wrong. If you fail to get placed, its your fault, our college has an excellent placement record. Look at the 'Pappu Xerox Center', Atul Vada Pav, Ankit Frankies'etc just outside our college. I can proudly say that they are my students! They visits our campus every year for placements!" excalimed Mr. Arun Gupta, the principal of the college. He also works as a the Chief Teacher at the nearby 'Sunshine Playgroup & Nursery'.

Meanwhile Akash and his friends have got full support of the local Congress MLA Altaf Bhai. Our representative contacted Altaf Bhai on this issue.

"Ye bandon ko apun ka pura support hai. Aisi faadu yojana ka laabh toh har kisi ko uthana chaiye. Apun bhi dekhtaye kis *abusive language not suitable for readers* mein itna dum  hai jo inki zhopdi ko haath laga ke dikhaye! Aise zhopdi khade karne wale sabhi college ke bantai ko apna fullto support hai" said Altaf Bhai.

With the rising unemployment in recent times, more such unemployed engineers, doctors, lawyers etc are already packing their things to set up slums nearby their colleges.

*Above article is purely imaginary and does not bear any resemblance with anything in reality. Readers are advised to take it with a pinch of salt and spices.*

Thank you for reading this crap. Your comments and criticisms would be appreciated warmly!